The Blog.

Who’s afraid of the big bad phone?

20 Jan 2014 | Mind monkeys

I want to tell you about one of my clients. Let’s call her Tina. I’m so proud of her.

Tina was afraid of the phone. Not cowering, gibbering wreck afraid. No way. But dreading, feet-dragging, easily distracted, I’ll-do-anything-to-avoid-it afraid.

Ever get that? Yup, me too.

But Tina had had enough. Fear was standing between her and her clients. The people who need her help, the people she loves working with. She decided she could no longer tolerate that fear.

So what did Tina do?

She decided to stare fear in the face.

She set herself a target, to make 5 calls each day, and started logging her fear factor –

Before making calls: 8/10, 6/10, 7/10…
and afterwards: 4/10, 3/10, 2/10…

What she noticed was this:

“Actually the fear just before doing something feels much worse than the actually doing it. I feel much better once I get off the phone, having made a call, than I do just before I make the call.”

Fear was the enemy, not the phone.

Making phone calls actually made her feel better.

That’s the thing about fear.

Fear fuels resistance and steals enjoyment, contentment and satisfaction.

Fear is the thing that has us saying

“I know it’s just… but I just can’t seem to bring myself to do it.”

“I know I can, but I’m doing everything else to avoid it.”

“I know it’s silly, but… anyway, I haven’t got time now.”

Fear is a shadow.

When it lurks behind you or looms over you, its presence is big, bad and scary. But a shadow has no substance. When you shine a light at it, face it head on, its power disperses.

What about you? Where is fear holding you back? What would you discover if you faced it head on?

Let’s talk about it. Leave me a comment or send me a message.

6 Comments

  1. Catherine Poole

    That article could have been written about me, Grace! And it’s true, I always feel better after I’ve made a phone call, but I put them off and put them off…..that reminds me, I need to phone someone up today!

    Reply
    • Grace Marshall

      Glad it resonates and inspired you Catherine! I suspect you’re not the only one at all. How did you get on with that phone call?

      Reply
  2. Joanna Pieters

    Ah Grace, yes, I think it’s one of the great undiscussed fears! Great to put it out in the open like this, and find that, with a bit of daylight, the monsters are just cobwebs.

    Reply
    • Grace Marshall

      Thanks Joanna! I love sharing experiences like this, because everyone thinks it’s just them. Fear has us believing it’s just us, but in reality we all struggle with it until we bring it out into the open.

      Reply
  3. naomirichards

    Great blog Grace. I think the phone can be a big fear especially if you are not a natural sales person and have to sell!

    Reply
    • Grace Marshall

      Definitely, and most of us are actually better than we think! I hate selling, but I love having a useful conversation!

      Reply

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Image if author Grace Marshall

About Grace

I coach, train, write and speak on productivity. I help people adopt new ways of working and thinking about their work to replace stress, overwhelm and frustration with success, sanity and satisfaction.

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