Actually that’s a bit deceptive. If you ever suggested that a stay-at-home mum is not working you’d be landing yourself in a whole world of trouble!
But it’s such a minefield. From what I can see mums who work want to spend more time at home and mums at home want to go to work. Then there’s the guilt factor. My mother-in-law is a complete traditionalist when it comes to this subject. In her words, nothing is more important than family, no one can bring up your children better than you and if that means having less money and a smaller house then so be it. While I agree with her on all accounts, I can’t deny that for me, it feels like something is missing.
And I think I’ve finally come to the realisation that no matter how much you reason and justify your current situation, if you’re not happy you’re not helping anyone. So to hell with the guilt trip, dammit I do want a career and indeed I think I need one.
When you think about it, it’s not surprising considering I spent the first 25 years of my life preparing myself and being encouraged to be independent and professional. Rightly or wrongly I am conditioned to find challenge and satisfaction from a career. The way I see it if I am happy and fulfilled I will be a better wife and mother, and time spent with my baby will be quality time and that’s what counts.
Which now leaves me with the less guilt-filled but equally perplexing question of what career to pursue! At least I have a head start on this one after an encouraging conversation over lunch today 🙂
It’s a hard decision to make, and not one I envy you for! However, I agree that you should do what makes you happy – good karma breeds good karma, neh? 🙂
That’s what I’m hoping 🙂 It’s surprising quite how much guilt I’ve had to get over though, mostly self-induced. I am definitely learning a lesson on being open-minded!